LOVE month:

I love that my marriage has very little drama.

LOVE month: feasting

Today is the first Sunday of the month, otherwise known as Fast Sunday in my culture. A day where we refrain from eating or drinking for a period of time in favor of turning our thoughts and hearts another direction.

This morning my stomach was growling before I even got out of bed. Actual physical hunger pains. The kind that would normally drive me straight to a bowl of granola, pronto. I visited with my Father in Heaven for a few minutes and began busying myself with other activities as to distract my hungry tummy. As I came downstairs I was just about bowled over by an exuberant little Beckham who had just eaten about 47 pancakes. He's so stinking happy to see me in the morning, it's good for my soul.

I realized as we wrestled and tickled and as I just about ate him up that kissing his face was all the feasting I needed for the day. He's absolutely delicious. He gives enormous hugs and I can squeeze his little squishiness. Kissing his face is like a meal, it fills me right up. And then he laughs and I simply can't take any more. My cup was full.

I wondered if coming so closely after his sister would keep this little guy in a shadow. His sister came to us in a unique way and had a lot of light on her. Being another boy who arrived in the world in a more conventional manner didn't have a lot limelight. My worries, as usual, were for naught. He comes with his own personality, mellow at times and huge as can be at others. He's perfect for me and he fills me up. Today, he's all I needed to feast on.

Writing Project, 2010. {you play a part.}

I have a dream.

A dream to be a great writer.

I'm not sure that my dream involves being officially published, although that would be hugely satisfying. I just want to be able to create pieces of writing that take the reader somewhere else for a short time. To create a story that one doesn't want to end or that he can't get enough of.

Sometimes writing is a talent, sometimes my lack of creativity puts it away for a while. Sometimes it's a hobby, one I yearn to have more time for. Mostly, it's just a dream. Denten asks me often why I haven't written a book and my answer is always that I don't know what I would write about. He tells me that is a lame excuse.

Regardless of whether a book is in my future, I would like to spend a little more time developing this little talent/hobby/interest of mine.

And here's where you come in:

I kindly request you to submit a word to me. A concept, a color, an object. A theme, a verb, a condition. An issue, a person, an experience. Someone I know, or don't. Something I have experience with, or not. Something physical, emtional, spiritual. Something I can run with, left to my own interpretation. I will put your suggestions in a bowl, draw one out at a time and write on the subject. Right here on this very blog.

For example: if you were to give me the word "ferocious," I might come up with something like the following: I was awakened by an incredibly ferocious storm last night that yanked me from a deep REM cycle and left me prone, flat on my back, paralyzed as the mean rain slammed sideways into my window and the wind, who was on a mission, swirled and howled around my home sending anything that wasn't attached clear into oblivion in a matter of seconds.

This is what I came up with at about 3:00 a.m. this morning when the very thing occurred outside. Some days you might get a better product, some days you won't. Some days it might be a story, others, an essay.

Is there something I have experienced that you want to know more about? {please note that I only contain minor amounts of both sarcasm and narcissism.} Here's your chance. Give me a word and you'll get my response. {a friend once asked me to record my thoughts regarding adoption. I'm not sure I ever did that adequately for her}. When I declared a few days ago that I love my friends, those are the thoughts that spilled out when writing about them.

I have a few requests: first, don't be nasty. I mean that both ways. Mostly, be nice. Don't give some terrible word that would kill me to write about. Second, I am not doing significant research for this project. If you give me a medical term I know nothing about, I will not spend hours educating myself on the condition and giving my synopsis. I will probably tell you what the word reminds me of, or write about a person I knew once who had a grandma with that ailment. Mostly I just need a little practice and need a place to start. So, hit me.

Some of these pieces will mostly likely be disastrous, but somewhere along the line there will be a gem. Some will be drafted and edited and some will be slapped down here and called done. And for those of you who can't handle all of my words, I might throw in a picture or two for you.

Thank you kindly in advance. comment, email, pick up the phone... pray about it first if you want, but send me your word.

Welcome to Writing Project 2010!

LOVE month, day 5

I love quiet nights.

Don't get me wrong, I also love nights when I get to escape, but tonight I love quiet nights.

When everyone is in bed, when my house settles down and it's just me and Dent. Sometimes just me. No outside obligations, no major messes to clean up. Dinner, conversation, most likely a project of some sort and and perhaps a little tv, of the dvr'd variety. Reading in bed before I succumb to the back of my eyelids. I love quiet nights.

LOVE month, day 4

I love my friends. I often say that I need my friends. I don't know if I would actually physically die without them, but they sure are important to my emotional health.

I spent my adolescent years and high school experience learning who I was rather than practicing the art of being a great friend. Therefore, I did not emerge from that time in my life with a great number of close friends. There are a few select girls who I keep in touch with from time to time and admire from a distance, but even they have a much larger circle from that time.

In college I fared a little better, taking from that time deeper relationships, a result of a less selfish me, I suppose. One friend imparticular is the kind everyone hopes to run into sooner rather than later in life.

My time in New York found me depending on friends for my very sanity. I needed them, they were a virtual lifeline and I loved them dearly. There was a group of women tossed into the same situation fumbling for solid ground and we found it together and had wonderful adventures along the way. Leaving the city broke my heart as I had learned to thrive on the hustle and bustle of Manhattan, but leaving the girls was something I simply couldn't face. We are now all over the country, our husbands building their various practices as we build our families. We admire, coach, support and hurt for each other from afar. I treasure these women and had serious doubts as to whether I would meet a group that filled my needs so perfectly again.

Those I call "my girls" now are a different mix. They aren't like the last group, which after some adjustment time, I deemed a good thing. They have different talents, ones I only dream of possessing. They have different personalities and priorities that have taught me rethink my box. They see the world differently and yet again, I have fallen in love. I have offended and they have offended and it passes and we move on. We laugh our heads off at the silliest things and love each other's children like our own. I spent last night with some of them and was grateful that silent moments weren't awkward at dinner as we could have probably guessed what each other was thinking. I know the things they struggle silently with and pray for the heartache to ease. I know without a doubt that if I needed them, not having my immediately family close, that they would step in and there wouldn't be a thing to worry about. Friends don't get better than that. I absolutely love mine.

LOVE month, day 4

Today I love:



yellow corn tortilla chips

pebble ice

a good turkey sandwich with avocado

breakfast burritos

top ramen. sorry, mom. it's true

baked goods involving chocolate

especially doughnuts

chicken tacos

pasta, preferably with homemade pesto

good asian

virgin strawberry daiquiris. on a beach.

hot cocoa. in the yurt.

and much, much more.

our potty adventures

It should be obvious by the title of this post that it involves adventures in the bathroom. If you are not ok with that, please move ahead with your computer tasks.

Seneca has had the hang of big girl underwear for over a month now and yet, it seems she still thinks she needs treats after going. She'll be playing and ask for a treat. I will say no and after thinking for a minute, she'll head for the bathroom. After doing her business she'll ask, "mom, can I have a potty treat?" shoot. She's smart. I try to tell her that we don't get treats every time we go, but for a while there, she did. Major bummer when the treats start fading out.

Sometimes when I emerge from the bathroom Seneca will ask me, "mom, you go potty?" Indeed I did. "good job, mommy!" thank you. "mommy, your panties dry?" yes, seneca. "I'm so proud of you mommy, you keep your panties dry!!" Seeing as my love language is words of affirmation, she's so good for my self-esteem.

Beckham has eased off enough in this process that he doesn't always have to be physically present when she does her business in the bathroom, but he still considers himself the official flusher. He'll let her do her thing, let me help with my part and then we are excused while he takes care of the flushing. He takes his job very seriously.

I must say, life with only one in diapers is significantly different than two. More so than I anticipated. Piece of cake, really. Although, I'll be happy as can be when Beckham decides he's ready for his turn on the potty. And, I'll also be very happy to start all over again with newborn diapers when the time comes. Join me in prayer that it happens sooner rather than later, will you? We've got the folks at Navajo Family Services on the job. They helped find me a winner last time, I'm sure they'll do it again.