endless rambles.

let's start with my stomach. it has been yelling at me for two days. it's so hungry, all the time. seriously, it feels like I have a significant calorie deficit going on, but I don't. I was a little under the weather for a couple of days, so it had a little making up to do, but this is bizarre. no, I'm not pregnant. part of the problem is that we have absolutely nothing in this house that sounds remotely good to me, so eating doesn't sound fun, but I can't run on empty and take care of this little crew, so I eat. but fresh and easy is calling my name. loudly. I'm coming, just as soon as denten walks in the door tonight.

that brings me to my next topic. for mother's day I received (after ample not-so-subtle hinting) a homemade coupon for a car detail. I'm cashing in today. D took dutch to the dealership for a little check-up and a full detail. it's probably not healthy how excited I am about that. I only hope they live up to my expectations. and they're high. I want my boy to look, smell and feel just like new and have no sign of the three children that share it with me. a fresh start, so to speak. you know, a renewal of the commitment I made to keep him shiny and clean when I got him. I can hardly wait, except that I will 'cause I want them to take their time and make it good.

so today suby took senny and I to swim lessons. I really love suby, it is a complete shame that she doesn't fit my littles well. I'd drive her to the death, I would. I'm really feeling my cars today, apparently. anyway, swimming lessons. I wondered if I would be bored doing swim lessons with senny, but that has not been the case at all. I've totally loved it. someone asked my why we were paying for an experience to do things she already knows. a few reasons: first, I learn how to teach her these things correctly, and can also use the skills I'm learning to teach bex. I get 30 minutes of one-on-one time with the senny, which you think I could have at home, but that's a little hard sometimes. seneca is having a blast. she's being challenged just enough to be uncomfortable for a minute and then master the skill and it's so fun to see her succeed and be proud of herself. it's amazing that at two-years-old, she displays a fight, one that pushes her to try something again even if she didn't like it for the sake of conquering it. gotta be honest, she didn't get that from me. she's a little delight, kicking her little heart out, blowing bubbles and eager to try new things. and her cheeks smushed under a pair of little pink goggles? well, that's worth it right there.

making a completely smooth transition to a completely unrelated topic: the bexinator. this kid greets me with an enormous drooly smile every time I look at him. he races his little waddly legs over to me and buries his head in my shoulder for a snuggle. he attempts to kiss me with a giddy open mouth and laughs so hard it nearly knocks him over. at what point do kids lose this uncontainable sunshine and glee that radiates from them? I'm shooting for never.

and one more thing to document for history's sake. my bedroom, you know, the place of peace and rest? it acquired a treadmill this week. a massively heavy treadmill. moving the sucker made us all sweat like we'd used it for hours. I'm gonna owe nick dinner for a week. oh, and the sweating? that was all them. mine came from watching D and nick and trying really hard not to picture it tumbling down the stairs. did I say tumbling? I mean crashing. seriously, it's heavy. I had to walk away. it's better that way sometimes. so between the treadmill, the bike trainer, the weights and the assortment of swimsuits constantly in rotation, my room looks like a gym with a bed in it. let's just be grateful it doesn't smell that way, shall we?

ok. I have more thoughts on more stuff, but that should do for now. over and out.