Writing Project (#1)

Navajo was not a written language for a long time. The art of story-telling is greatly developed in that culture, but little has been recorded with a pen and paper. Perhaps to those living in that culture, Grandma Bitsilly's life is not out of the ordinary, but to me it is fascinating and I want it recorded. Last November when we visited her for Thanksgiving, I spent significant time with her having her tell me "her story." I didn't start with specific questions, I just let her talk, notebook in hand, and tried to keep up. Occasionally I'd ask for more detail, or clarification, but mostly observed as her mind travelled back through time and enjoyed precious memories.

During this most recent trip, I took what I had written and checked for accuracy. I watched as her little hunched frame would shake with silent laughter as I read over a funny memory, or as her eyes would suddenly get very deep and still when hearing about something not so pleasant to recall. It is my project now to put those stories together and get it written for my children and her posterity to have. I know it is far from a full compilation of the incredible experiences she has lived through, but it's what she chose to tell at this time, and I considered it a great compliment when she said that I had done a good thing, it was just as she said.

Included are a few stories of Che, or grandpa. He passed away 17 years ago and while he is remembered fondly, it is not appropriate to speak of the dead in that culture. I happen to break most of those kinds of rules and asked questions anyway. Here is a great picture of Che during his time as a rear-gunner during WWII. The limited knowledge I have of this man earns him the greatest respect in my mind.

This was written on the back of the photo:

"USS Hornet, 1943

This picture was taken in the Pacific War in 1943- when I was ready to go on our mission from the Aircraft Carrier USS Hornet- we kissed the Seattle Gate, Goodbye in 1942- and didn't moan perhaps, all we had in mind was Jap's Island in the pacific. You'll like your mission when you know it as I do. We bombed the Jap's Ammunition dumps and cave's and battleships. In many case's the only warning would be the "cry" "Fire in the Hole." I thought My day was up in the war- but I came home safe and sound, War was Hell."

This photo is of Denten's mother, Dianna, and her younger brother, Elvis. What a treasure!

Ahhh.... Culture

**Disclaimer: Denten took almost 400 photos in two days. Be grateful there are less than 20 in this post!

2008 Bitsilly Family Reunion.

Location: Grandma Bitsilly's property, Tohatchi, NM.

Robinson Family

Robinson Family with Grandma

Grandma Bitsilly and her Robinson Great-grandchildren

Our fam with Grandma

The Bitsilly women!

Seneca, DaNae, Grandma, Dianna, Cheyanne

Dent and I after a lovely (read: bumpy) ride through the desert

Seneca and her new favorite treat

seriously, she couldn't get enough.

This is the hogan that Grandma and Che (grandpa) built when they first moved to this property. it is a one-room building with mudded walls, a dirt floor and a wood-burning stove in the middle. Various family members have stayed here on occasion when they needed a place, but luckily for us it was vacant this weekend. It had some junk stored in there, but there was plenty of room for a portable crib for napping!

Saturday morning Seneca had a great nap in there. A few hours after she woke up, Cooper ran to the trailer summoning us to come see the snake. Turns out Drew had a rattlesnake cornered in the hogan... yep, the very place my baby had been sleeping. nice. Winston and Drew killed it, saving the rattle, of course.

We figured with the snake taken care of, it was once again suitable for napping. Seneca and Beckham took turns having great naps in the hogan during our stay there.

Coop, mom and Bex


Little Bex, just hanging out.

This is Denten's cousin, Olin. He has been dancing for years and is so great to watch!

Cousin Brenden, doing the traditional grass dance.

Sweet Grandma.

This year we celebrated her 80th birthday. There is no actual record of when she was born, but she chooses to celebrate her birthday in September and the guess is that she's close to 80!

Aunt Delphine and Senny, the first contestants in the dance contest!

A few years ago, Aunt Joey started a fun run/walk to be implented at the reunion. The goal was to put a little emphasis on keeping our bodies healthy. Even though Joey couldn't join us this year, we kept the tradition alive. Senny rode in a pack on her Grandpa's back... here is her blue ribbon.

Senny and Landon dancing after our fun run. Landon is so sweet to these babies and he and coop had blast, going all day long!

It's amazing how much we packed into two days... I could go on and on! The best part was reconnecting with these family members that we see so seldomly and have them get to know our children. Cooper and Seneca had such a good time playing with lots of new cousins. Digging in the dirt provides hours of entertainment, apparantly!

I'm grateful it was easy to camp with these kiddos and that they had such a great time. I'm grateful to be a part of such a culturally-rich family who accepts my white skin. I get teased consistenly for my "biliguanna" ways, but it comes with love. 'Til next year...

We're off...

to have more moments like these!

We're headed to tohatchi, to camp on the rez...

Wish me luck, it's gonna be a blast!

(mom, I just know you wish you were coming..)

another reason to count your blessings

Patria reminded me that aside from recording my life events and wasting a lot of time, this blogging business has it's up side. She turned me onto a daily scoop, another reason to count my blessings every day. Stephanie, the author of this blog, had her baby girl drown last month and has had her blog turn from sharing fun family events to one of sharing this deep experience for her. Like Patria, the social worker buried inside of me appreciates the education she's giving, but the mother in me wants to sit and cry with her, on so many levels.

It's a similar experience to reading leslie's blog, who, as a young mother, lost her husband unexpectedly last year. I understand that there are many out there that feel sharing such intimate thoughts on the blogosphere is inappropriate, but seeing as I'm often an "over-sharer," I really appreciate a peek into their world and the opportunity it presents to reevaluate the things I'm spending my time on. And worrying about. It helps bring the fragile reality of our existence a little closer and take the time to appreciate the blessing it is that I have the people I love all around me. I'm sure tragedy will hit me one day, but I hope that as I read these women's amazing stories and they way they have handled their situations that I am learning. I wonder how much I would share and if I would handle such a loss with the grace and peace that Stephanie shows. I hope so.

I have been reminded directly through minor bumps in my road that these little things are preparing me for greater challenges to come. I have chosen to prepare for them rather than worry about when and how they will occur. I figure if I can count on my Father in Heaven now that he'll still be there when life comes at me hard, so I'll continue to develop my relationship with him, to strengthen my faith and to press forward. Despite my tendency to over analyze (yes, I know it and can freely admit), I have actually learned that there are aspects of my life that I have more control over than I ever wanted to admit in the past. While they may not include the challenges life has in store for me, they do include the way I respond to these situations. I'm a work in progress, probably always will be, but it's nice when I can actually see the "progress" part. If you have a minute, browse through Stephanie's blog and count your blessings today.

Souls vs. Bodies

It's time for a post that has nothing to do with my children. Because I do actually have a brain in there and occasionally it functions independent from these little people all around me.

Have you read The Host (stephenie meyer)? It took longer for me to get into than Vampires and Werewolves (go figure), but I ended up really enjoying it. It was more thought-provoking for me than I anticipated. It made me think on a few things... is it actually our spirits (or our souls) that run our physical bodies? It appears that way seeing as once a physical body dies and the spirit leaves it, the body is really good for nothing at that point. I mean, we have a tradition of either burying it in the earth or burning it to ashes, either option rendering the body useless for the time being. It's the spirit or the soul inside that gives it life, that makes it bend and stretch and become functional.

Granted, none of this is brand new information to me, but it made me wonder if I would still be me if I happened to be in another body. If we took Amberly, the soul, and put me into Katelyn's body, would I be able run a long way and perhaps enjoy the experience? Would I automatically be in better physical shape because that's the nature of my new body, or is that her soul that gives her those perks? If we extracted me from my body and inserted me into Shellie, would I automatically be a wonder creatively? Would tasks that I labor over for hours be a breeze because I would be in her? Or if her soul vacated her body would she then be left as ignorant as I currently am regarding such things? And as long as we're wondering, if my little (yet incredible) soul was put into a typically unemotional male (read: any that I happen to be related to) would I then not emotionally overreact to events on a regular basis? Would I not be a sap for a really good love story or appreciate regular validation? We could blame the estrogen in me for a few of those occurrences, but not all females I know have the emotional output I am capable of. What on earth would I be like as a male?

Would you still be attracted to the person/ type of person that you are if they were in a different body? None of us are so shallow as to say that all we are attracted to is the physical body of our significant other, but would we have been initially attracted to them if they were residing in another form... is it their spirit that we really crave? I think the man I married is pretty dang hot, but it's really the person inside that I love... I mean, what if Nicole Kidman was walking around with Robin William's soul inside of her, she would be totally different!


How much of who I am has to do with the physical body that I possess? I understand my body gives me the opportunity to build character and patience with its limitations, but what part does it play in my identity... I could say it's just a body, that the real me is flowing inside and would function just the same in another vessel, but on the other hand, this physical body of mine is pretty darn amazing. It's a stinkin' miracle the way all my systems inside work together just as they should and keep me moving every day. It's pretty obvious to me that as lovely as monkeys are that I did not derive directly from one. Lots of heavenly thought went into creating me, both the physical me and the spirit that jumps around inside of there.

I've already jumped into the next read Mutant Message Down Under, which is fabulous so far. It's by Marlo Morgan and anyone who wishes to read and discuss, I'm very open to that idea. I've already begun over analyzing the concepts discussed in this one and they're fascinating. I really should read more if this is what it makes my brain do...

Six Months, Baby!!

Seriously, is this the same kid??

and has it really been six months?

man, time flies when you're up to your ears in diapers, formula and milestones...

we've had fantastic moments this year... here's to the rest of it!

Seneca

A few more wonders from Annie... she was able to capture this sweet face perfectly.

Seneca at one year.

This little girl makes us smile every day. She's testing limits, into everything and yet we still can't get enough of her.

She's walking all over the place and is doing her best to make herself heard and then at the end of the day, she'll let us cuddle with her, and kiss those great cheeks.


What an amazing blessing this little one has been in this home. She simply radiates light around here. We love you Senny baby!

a few gratefuls

1. automobiles that function as they should. suby has had some issues this week and it reminded me that when one fails, it's sure nice to have a back-up! i'm grateful that most of the time we have two great, fully-functioning cars to get us around.

2. super grocery savings. I saved $100 this morning! it's so awesome to walk out of the grocery store with so much stuff that I paid little or nothing for. I haven't had the greatest attitude about couponing lately because I was so behind, but after catching up and taking advantage of a few great deals, I was reminded why I do this. I'm grateful that I have the opportunity to save my family money and get great deals. I've also decided that early morning is my favorite time to get groceries. I can do it without any children and with very few people in the store.

3. dinner group. having dinner in my fridge, all ready to eat at 6:00 each night is so great. it's fun to try new things and even more fun that I didn't have to make it all!

4. mark and flowers. jaime and mark are some of our dearest friends, still residing in manhattan. mark was here on business this week and took some time to come see us. he's still one my favorite people to visit with. he knows how to have a great conversation about a wide variety of topic. he even brought us flowers... I love having fresh flowers in my home. it was wonderful to see him, although it made me miss jaime A LOT.

Beckham

This is Bex at 5 months. He is currently the joy of my life. He's easy and pleasant, he eats and sleeps well and is a happy guy when he's awake. He absolutely is supposed to be in our family right now, we wouldn't be complete without him. And he's so stinkin' kissable!

Beckham enjoys his brother. Coop can get more laughs out of him than anyone else. He enjoys a clean bottom, feeding time and seeing his dad walk into the room.

He's patient with his sister. Senenca loves to be close to Beckham.. sometimes too close. She loves him with all the force she has, and she's strong. He's patient with hot summer afternoons at swimming lessons. He's patient when there is someone else to feed and he's hungry.

He blesses me with smiles often. He's learning to sit, he can move around when left to his own devices on the floor and is learning that being on his back is not the end of the world. I love this little man to pieces.

photography courtesy annie, flashbax photography.

A wise guy

A few more thoughts from Ammon this morning. He's got lots for me this week!

He's telling Lamoni that he was called by the spirit to teach. I love the wording in vs 35 where he says that that same spirit lives in each of us and that it gives knowledge and power.

34 Ammon said unto him: I am a man; and man in the beginning was created after the image of God, and I am called by his Holy Spirit to teach these things unto this people, that they may be brought to a knowledge of that which is just and true;

35 And a portion of that Spirit dwelleth in me, which giveth me knowledge, and also power according to my faith and desires which are in God.

We all have that spirit in us and we all have access to that same knowledge and power as long as our faith is in place. I need knowledge to come to my mind on many different issues each day and it's quite comforting to know that it's there and I just need to remember to draw on it. I often go looking for my answers elsewhere, but this was a great reminder to me that I have direct access to the spirit who will deliver the answers I need as long I remember to ask. The world so often filters into my life in a way that I think of searching online or in a book or within friend's experiences to find the things I'm looking for. For some reason I've had to learn this lesson more than once, but if I just remember to ask Heavenly Father first, he always delivers. He knows me and my particular situation better than any other "expert" and never fails to direct me to the things I am looking for.

Random Monday

1. pigtails.

2. bottoms. Beckham smiles and laughs every time I change his diaper. especially the messy ones. I don't know if his little bottom is ticklish or if he just really likes to have a clean diaper, but it makes changing diapers not-so-dreaded!

3. ammon. After our sunday school lesson yesterday I wanted to read this story again. I realize that it would have probably benefited me more had I read the lesson ahead of time, but it is what it is. As I read this morning, I was reminded why it is such a great story with so many lessons. While I think Ammon was an amazing man, I don't think he had any magical talents. He had the same capabilities that the rest of us do. What I took away from it this morning is that he had such great and unwavering faith. He knew he had the Lord behind him and therefore didn't hesitate taking on this threatening group of rascals tormenting the sheep. He was completely confident in standing before Lamoni because he was sure of his faith and with whom he worked. If we are sure that we are working with Heavenly Father and that he's always got our back, there is no reason for hesitation or a lack of confidence. Go forward with faith. And, as brother sheffer so subtly pointed out yesterday, ammon was pretty darn good-looking. sure, it may be some artist's interpretation, but who am I to argue with a handsome man of God?? (I did marry one, after all).

4. patria. if you haven't checked out her blog, just do it. She and her completely darling little family live on the beach in hawaii. yes, it's paradise. the best thing about her is that her attitude about life reflects that she lives on the beach. she is light-hearted, yet deep-thinking. she looks at the world with such a positive light that it can't help but be contagious. while her life makes me want to live by the ocean, it also makes me want to see the good and the love in the world that surrounds me and make the most of it. her children are carefree and happy and beautiful, in and out. and her husband takes FANTASTIC pictures. his blog is worth checking out as well.

5. overheard: from the backseat... "ow!" what? "seneca bit my finger!" uh-huh. and who put your finger in her mouth? "I did." hm. maybe we shouldn't do that anymore. "ok."

Memories...

Ode to Jackie, Alicia and so on...

Here are the directions:

1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you. If you don't want to play on your blog, or if you don't have a blog, I'll leave my memory of you in my comments.

p.s. for those of you who knew me in high school, please be gentle. I have actually managed to gather a bit of dignity and respect since then, believe it or not!

Holy Smokes

Cooper never really took a pacifier. It was my fault. I was afraid to have him take one because I knew someday I'd have to take it away and didn't want to fight that battle. Beckham doesn't take one either, he simply can't keep it in, not that I give him much opportunity to develop the skill. Seneca, however, had one in her mouth the moment I met her... it worked for her, so I didn't object. Well, I did, but not strongly. I like to think my children have the ability to comfort themselves and not be dependent on it. There were rough moments I wish I had a plug, but overall it's been fine with the boys. The dreaded moment has arrived with Seneca. She's completely old enough not to need a pacifier and yet we've still been giving in. It's just so easy! I have kept postponing the paci-snatch citing excuses such as, "it will make the drive so much easier, she'll sleep so much better..."

I've got a thing. Once they're walking and attempting to be talking, I don't think they need it. I don't want it hindering speech and I think it looks lame to see a big kid walking around with a plug in his mouth. Don't worry, I'm not judging anyone imparticular, I just don't want that kid to be mine. I haven't given Seneca hers since we got home sunday night. She has awaken early and not gone back to sleep and she's had some grumpy moments, but the full force of the snatch did not hit until this afternoon. Look out everyone... this girl has lungs!! And she'll use them to protest. Seriously. She's loud. She's learning slowly that her mother can be as stubborn as she is. This, too, will pass. Right??

A Photo Parade: The Robinson's do Southern Utah

dad and coop at paragonah reservoir

getting up early to go fishing is exhausting!

the day's catch

grandpa dale

happy senny

don't you just want to kiss her?

grandma delores and beckham, the solemn observers

seneca in the one-year-old race

cooper, the quickest three-year-old in town!

check out that concentration! (yes, I caught it)

cooper and lexie. his hair was awesome this trip. no styling done for the photo.

classic grandpa dale

our family tree in horse valley. denten added two names for us this year!

dad and coop at the cabin

this girl would play outside all day

I think we were done with pictures at this point.