stalling.

The toy closet needs to be organized. It's not a complete disaster, but we've had about 12 kids in there this week and things need to be put back where they belong. I don't mind the job once I get going, but I've been waiting for the motivation to hit me all day.

We just dropped Coop off with some friends for a pizza and movie night. When did he get old enough to do such things? We lucked out finding this fun group of boys. There are five of them and they are all darling. They are smart and kind and they have such a good time together. I will always be concerned that he is exposed to more than I am ready for him to face so time with great friends is welcomed by both of us.

Thankfully Seneca and Beckham think it's a party around here all the time and are happy to let their imaginations run wild together often. They go from princess talk to racing cars to creating obstacle courses for themselves one right after another. Playing stalled for a minute after Beckham leaped off a barstool aiming for couch cushion and missed, but he recovered quickly.

We went shopping for D's birthday today. I am not confident that our surprises will remain such until Monday. They already tried to tell him "secrets" on the phone. Maybe we'll get lucky and they'll forget about it, but it is not likely.

Dent is finally back in the valley after a few days in Supai. He's had a long travel day and we'll be glad when he gets home. Although props to me for holding it together happily while he was gone. Not to say he wasn't missed, but bedtime came around each night I wasn't ready to run away. That's progress, folks. I think we have extra angels lifting mom's patience when dad is gone.

All right, toy closet, here I come. I will conquer you within the hour. Ready? Go.

a wednesday

I opted for the later gym class today so I wouldn’t have to come home between working out and preschool drop-off.  We spent the morning getting coop off to school and Dent out the door to work and trip to Supai.  We picked up and got ready for the day then were off to the gym.  Took a weights class today that was good and a rest for my aching calves that are still sore from my massive cardio class Monday. I’m grateful my kids are happy to play at the gym so I can go and that the women working with them are great. 

After Beckham and I dropped Senny off at school we came right home to find friends were already waiting for us.  D, J and S came for lunch.  We may have our differences (and we do) but we pull together pretty well.  We created a pretty delish lunch and enjoyed visiting while the boys ran around.  I’m grateful for a yard that accommodates lots of fun little friends on a regular basis.  I’m also grateful my friends will drive to see me and that we can always find something to laugh about.

We picked up Seneca and intended on quick naps before dance class but quick didn’t happen and therefore dance didn’t either.  It was a bummer to miss it, but both of them slept until almost 4:30, which was unusual but much needed.  It allowed me time with Coop for homework, reading and music practice.  By the time the kids woke up we were on our way out the door to soccer practice.  We are trying a different league this season and hope it will be better than the last one.  I was not an experienced soccer mom before we moved but now that we have had a few different experiences I am more impressed with Laveen’s program.  Steve and Jeff organized a productive and fun program.  Cooper had a good time and Senny and Bex enjoyed running around and rolling down hills.  I got cold. 

We rushed home to throw on jammies, read and jump in bed before Jacob came over to sit with the kids so I could go to book club.  It was a lovely evening with fun new friends and the prospect of  great literature headed my way.  Speaking of which, my book and I are headed to bed now, because tomorrow is another day that will be ready to begin all too soon. 

good things.

I’m excited about new gym classes.  I have not been a member of a gym since Columbia, and I’m not sure that a student gym counts… but oh, the classes were great!  Jaime and I were dedicated to “body sculpting” and it was best when Vanessa taught.  That is my idea of a great, fun workout.  I have tried to be a runner, I go in phases, but I have never loved it.  I do love, however, a great upbeat class that combines cardio and strength-training.  I tried two new ones out last week and loved them!  I have a few others slated for this week and am completely looking forward to them.

I have an awesome friend who is considering a move to our area.  I am excited about the prospect of having her close!

I have a husband who took care of breakfast, lunch and dinner around here yesterday.  Church at 8:30 means we have to get it together to make it on time and it helps so much when he does breakfast while I get ready.  He also put a roast in the crock pot for dinner and grilled for lunch after church.  I was incredibly grateful for all the time I didn’t spend in the kitchen yesterday. 

That same husband bought me a bathrobe for Christmas.  Not a glamorous gift, you say?  I’ll tell you what, that thing has gotten a lot of use in the last month!  It is super soft, warm and cozy and I wear it all. the. time.  When kids get up at night my robe keeps me from freezing and to be honest it does the same thing during the day.  There may have even been a few days when I was fully dressed, still chilly and put my robe on over everything for an extra cozy layer. 

A reminder yesterday in Relief Society to keep first things first.  We discussed a few talks from last conference and I came home with new ideas to keep priorities straight around here.  It’s a little tricky considering all the following are on the the calendar for this week:  chess club, music class, preschool open house, lunch with the girls, dance class, soccer practice, book club, dentist appointment and a home inspection on the rental house… and I think D is going out of town later this week.   Throw in learning time, music practice, homework, nightly reading and scriptures and I hope we have time to eat this week! 

And a new little cousin.  My kids love to come to the computer and see pictures of “sweet cousin Bode.”   So many good things around here!

weekend recap… with a baby!

 

Last night we had fun friends here to help us celebrate Beckham’s birthday.  Balloons, cupcakes and people singing to him… that’s all he needs to be a happy birthday boy!

Today I painted little finger and toenails with Seneca.

I set off a very anti-climactic volcano with Beckham.

And best of all… little Bode finally made his way into the world!  My little petite sister delivered an almost-10 pound baby on Saturday… holy smokes.  I’ve been impressed with Katelyn several times in my life, but this was major.  I didn’t think I would have the need to be there, but it’s killing me not to hold this little guy and love on him big time!  I may need to make a road trip and steal him away…

Bode Banks Hunt… Saturday 11:39 a.m. 9 lbs 13 oz., 20 inches.  Aahhh, delicious!

He’s Three!!!

 

 

Dear loved ones,  you sent all the right things and we have been enjoying them all day… thank you! 

Dear loved ones (again), if you happen to be sending stuff in static-y styrofoam packing peanuts I would like to request:

a) please warn the mother ahead of time so all said peanuts may be disposed of before three-year-olds find them.

b) save money and just send the peanuts. 

This kid is a complete delight.  He’s pleasant and funny and sweet and darling.  We are lucky, lucky ducks!

And tell me the cape isn’t awesome.  It is awesome. 

I should take credit, but it was merely my brilliant idea.  Sister Malinka made it all come to pass.

And just for the record, Beckham is still oh, so delicious and I can’t ever get my fill.

I am stuck in a dichotomy of sorts.  Perhaps I always will be, it may just be part of who I am.  For the past few months it has been rare that a night goes by without a little person appearing next to the side of my bed in the middle of the night.  They don’t say much and are easily led back to bed, sometimes after a stop in the bathroom.  Sometimes I tuck them in and slip out quickly, anxious to get back to my bed and my dreams.  Sometimes I lay for a few minutes until their breathing changes and I know they are in another world of their own. 

I struggle with finding the balance between teaching self-soothing and soaking up the time where they need me and only me.  It started when my first was born and I was adamant about sleep training and schedules and teaching him to do it on his own.  I was not going to be the mother with the baby who would not go to sleep without a pacifier or rocking or something that would be difficult to break away from.  I wanted to have the child who could fall asleep on his own and could do it wherever we were.  It worked, for the most part and all my children were pretty good sleepers as babies.  I suppose having a method is comforting to me- whether it be for sleeping, potty-training, discipline, etc. 

So it’s hard for me that I am waken up by these little people every night when I know they are old enough to stay in their beds and go back to sleep on their own.  I want them to be able to do that, for them and for me.  I want them to have the ability and I want me to have continuous sleep.  I’ve contemplated how to do this… what if I just didn’t get out of bed and had them go back on their own?  Well, for one thing the house would not remain quiet.  There would be protesting.  Loud protesting that would very likely take quite a while to settle.  That is worth it for a few nights if it would work.  How am I to know what will work? 

Then I read Amy’s post today and remembered.  I get told often by those whose children are older than mine that these years fly by so quickly and that I will surely miss them when they are gone.  Amy is profoundly good at capturing moments and allowing them to impact her.  My children will not need me in the middle of the night forever (I hope).  Perhaps they will not always want me to lay with them for three minutes (beckham’s current request).  Seneca might not always share her blanket with me as I lay by her and tickle her back just one more time.  They are moments to be enjoyed, not rushed.  I thought when I had infants that by the time they were this age that we would all be sleeping through the night.  I was wrong, but I know that there will be a point in my life where I’m sure I will have time to sleep.  So for now I will attempt to enjoy the fact that they need me.  and want me.  and love me.  And I will still try to figure out how to keep their little bodies in their beds because that is just how I was made.  But I’ll ease up.  And I’ll relish these opportunities to snuggle with them until their breathing changes and they are once again, sound asleep.

Dear Aunt Lindsay,

Thank you for my crocodiles, they are super cool. I sleep with my little stuffed one every night, in fact it's starting to come apart a little because I love it so much. My mom is grossed out by the crocodile eggs hatching on our kitchen counter, but Cooper and I think they are awesome! I accidentally dropped my egg before we put it in the water, so mind is hatching faster than Cooper's. Mom really does think they are gross, but she figures they won't last forever and she likes how excited we get when we come to check out our eggs. Thanks for bringing us such cool stuff from Australia. Maybe could I come with you next time you go? I'm pretty sure I would love to see a real crocodile!

Love,

Beckham

a snapshot of me

right now…

- I enjoy a bowl of granola for breakfast.  Vanilla almond flavor from Trader Joe’s.  I average a bowl a day.

- I get out of bed between 6 and 6:30 a.m.

- I wear my black lulu pants and my slippers more than any other item of clothing I own.

- I snack on cheese and crackers.  English cheddar cheese with caramelized onions form TJ’s with wheat crackers is my favorite combo right now.

- I aim to be in bed by 10:00 every night.  I hustle to get there so I can read for a while before I go to sleep.

- I go in phases with what I eat for lunch.  I was in a grilled tomato sandwich phase but am now in a regular ramen routine.  Thankfully I think I’m pulling out of it.

- My hair has been long for a while.  Well, long for me.  Denten said the other day that he was surprised I hadn’t want to cut it lately because I am usually not satisfied with my style for very long. 

- I listen to primary songs and scripture scouts when I’m driving unless I happen to be alone.  When that miracle occurs I drift between NPR, current pop hits and a country station.

- Asian is my preferred type of cuisine these days.

- I am currently half-way through the Hearts of the Children series by Dean Hughes.  I began after we got home from Christmas break and expect to be done by the end of the month.  I have Outlander waiting patiently to be next.  Pillars of the Earth and a Love and Logic book are on hold for me at the library and the Five Love Languages for Children is on it’s way.

- My grey skinny jeans from the gap are my favorite pair of jeans.  They are probably not the most flattering, but they are the most comfortable.  The blue cardigan I got at Nordstrom’s with my mom is my favorite and most-worn sweater.

- My mind is regularly occupied with thoughts of schools and education.

- I love my brown sheets with satin polka-dots and my bath towels from the Lowell.

- I lost one of my turquoise circle stud earrings at my in-laws over  Christmas.  They were the pair I wore most frequently.  I lean toward gold and brown more than silver.

- I have not had a pedicure since Thanksgiving.  Thankfully it is not summertime or that would never do.

- I do sodoku when I am in the bathroom for any amount of time over 25 seconds.

- I think Cooper’s room is my favorite room in my house right now.  It is the only one with real furniture and stuff on the walls. 

- I use my green and white McCall blanket whenever I am on the couch.  I use my blue quilt my mom made me when I was in YW when I nap on my bed. 

- I prefer soft toothbrush bristles. 

- I am 31 years old, between 5’5’’ and 5’6’’ and weigh between 102 and 105 lbs. 

how long have you know me?

I’ll give you about 28 years if you recognize this dress.  I wish I had the picture of me in it to post as well but I can’t find it.  My grandparents brought matching dresses back for my sister and I (and cousins?) after visiting Scandinavia.  I wish I knew the full story of this dress better.  I don’t know if they were on church assignment or just a vacation and I want to say it’s from Austria but I’m not certain about that either.  If anyone knows more details than I do, please share! 

I know Katelyn’s was blue- Kate, do you have yours?  I bet it would fit Tess about now.  Emily, Annie, did you get dresses??  It was fun for me to help Senny put this on, I remember loving this dress because it was different.  It had cool buttons and an apron.  And while my Native American daughter looks anything but Scandinavian, she still looked like a little doll.

today.

• 74 degrees.  heaven.
• fresh produce to last the week.
• delicious bread.
• finished my book. and deep into another.
• forts/ machines/ obstacle courses created.
• beckham singing while bike riding.
• biking, running, installing new thermostat.
• new project ideas discussed.
• budget kinks worked out.
• expecting a baby-sitter in 90 minutes.
• an evening out.

what’s happening

I have a sickie.  I might have three on the verge.  It definitely took over my body and if I was an actual employed working woman there would have been at least one sick day taken this week, maybe more.  But, alas, this mama needs to function.  The boys are teetering with coughs and the occasional sore throat complaint.  Miss Senny had a rough night and is feverish this morning.  She’s happy to take it easy and Beckham thinks he’s ready to navigate preschool on his own.  I have been grateful for essential oils, Halls citrus throat drops and the priesthood in the last 24 hours.

Denten has two trials today.  I wonder if that means that when today is over we will see him again.  I should ask, but you see, I haven’t really seen him.  Chances are that all this prep work for today means that other work is going to need some serious attention when today is over.  It was nice to say hello to him at midnight last night.  He appears healthy- perhaps staying away from us this week is all part of the plan!

I am working on making a miracle happen for our family.  I have petitioned Heaven’s help and have done all up to this point that I have been prompted to do.  I have not been able to see how it is going to come to pass yet, and have hit what could be considered roadblocks, but I am ever-so-hopeful.  So much so that occasionally I catch myself dreaming about what it will be like when everything is in place and get cautious about being too hopeful.  But let’s be honest… I’ve had disappointment in this area before and I’m using all the hope I can get to make it happen this time.  I am very excited about the possibilities.

Energy session and parent-teacher conferences today.  Otherwise, this household is taking it easy!

Jesus wants senny for a sunbeam.

We were travelling home last Sunday and therefore today was the first day of Sunbeams for this little lady.  Despite the look on her face, she was a little apprehensive about it.  She got over it quickly and loved being in primary.  Beckham felt jipped, but is trying to embrace his role as “big kid” in nursery this year. 

After great naps and a lovely Sunday afternoon and dinner with friends, this is how we ended our Sabbath.  A fire and stories with dad.  Perfect.

tid-bits.

Seneca has been Snow White all day, in costume, even.  Beckham has been following her around with a styrofoam sword.  I asked if he was Prince Charming.  He replied, “yeah, and I hit the Nephites!”  Fantasy mingled with scripture… that’s ok, right?

Cooper heard about the winter edition of Wipeout and had his dad record it for him.  I don’t know what it is about watching people/ animals hurt themselves, but he finds it hilarious.  He laughs his head off at Tom and Jerry and it was no different as he watched Wipeout with Dent this afternoon.  He was busting up.  And then he went outside to “play” Wipeout… except that he doesn’t ever fall.  He was jumping over imaginary obstacles and turning to avoid invisible things swinging at him.  This kid needs a major obstacle course all the time and he would be happy.

We got our monthly newsletter from Navajo Family Services today containing profiles for some of the children who are seeking adoption.  It contained ten sibling groups, from two to five children.  Of course it would be ideal to keep these kids together, and I hope so much that that can happen, but chances have got to be slim that a family can welcome in that many children at a time and deal with the emotional issues that they bring.  I wish I was in a position to do that, but I think that would mean giving up what I already have and I’m not willing to do that.  Sometimes it feels selfish to be holding out for an infant when there are so many children who need homes and so many families waiting for babies, but that is what feels right in our family right now.  I can, however, hope that my Father in Heaven can orchestrate the homes that these children need. 

Seneca was standing on the ottoman singing at the top of her lungs and waving her arms around and when she finished she took a deep bow and Beckham, watching from the couch, started shouting, “Bravo!  Bravo!”  Where on earth did he learn that??  Oh, and he’s wearing the Rapunzel dress.  With off-the-shoulder sleeves.

Seneca got princess shoes for Christmas, you know, the plastic clipity-clop kind.  All three of my children are becoming quite adept at walking in high-heels.

I’ve been working on our upcoming fundraiser auction for Joete’s Playground and I’m excited about the possibilities of great donations this year.  I know it will be a lot of work for those involved, but it is a project I feel great about and am grateful to be a part of.  If you have connections that would benefit our auction, I would love to hear about them!

I think it has taken all day for Denten to recover from the minor frostbite he received on his toes this morning.  He biked 65 miles and despite what you winter folk think, it was cold here!  I was quite grateful to stay in bed with my book this morning. 

It is a bummer when the tether ball is used as a swing and breaks.  And even more of a bummer when it happens a second time.  Dad fixed it once again- we’ll see how long it lasts. 

I have a few great friends, cousins and one stellar sister who are due to have babies in the next few weeks.  I can’t wait for the pics of these cute, squishy souls to come rolling in! 

a new day

 

a picture that has nothing to do with this post:

this is how Seneca rides down a sledding hill

Today is bound to be better than yesterday, although truth be told, yesterday wasn’t all that bad until it was.  You know. 

Anyway, we’re happy and productive today and on our way to having a super day.  Thanks for the love.

Maybe today I should remove this giant ridiculous can of processed popcorn from my living room.  It was kind of under the tree, never touched, tree is gone and this thing remains.  I’m sure if my children knew what was in it they would help me remove it quickly, but alas, they haven’t a clue.  Perhaps because I don’t buy ginormous cans of popcorn with powdered cheese on it.  ick.  But, I suppose it was kind of the woman who gave it to us.  Thank you, kind woman.  (don’t worry, she doesn’t read this blog).

I should go fold laundry, you know, be productive as I stated before?  But I feel chatty.  What else can I share with you? 

Oh!  Someone is getting a surprise in the mail… we’re sending it off today.  Want to know if it’s you?  Well, it is if your initials are EBJ and you live in Gresham.  Bummer for you if you don’t fit that criteria, but I would be most happy to send you a surprise another time.  After I fold my laundry. 

Beckham is now wearing my boots.  They go up to his bottom.  He is surprisingly coordinated. 

ciao.

the truth.

I think I went all day without yelling at my children.  Take that as an honest confession.  That was my goal today.  I got stern, I gritted my teeth, I may have even balled up my fists at my sides, but I don’t think I yelled. 

Can I be honest?  Ok.  I dislike Cooper going to his current school for oh, so many reasons, but one of them is that I have been disappointed several times when he comes home.  I look forward to him getting home all day- I hate him being gone.  I know in my gut that he is not in the very best environment he could be and when I think about it eats away at me.  So, I’m excited when 2:30 rolls around and he comes through the front door.  Until his siblings wake up.  Sometimes it’s a fun afternoon of learning and playing and music and fun, but sometimes it’s an afternoon of bugging and aggravating and complaining and rudeness.  I am much better equipped to handle the hours that hold the dinnertime and bedtime routines when we have had a pleasant afternoon, but I am not so well-equipped to handle that oh-so-special time of day when my patience has already been rolled out and stamped on.  Seeing as I have such a busy social life after 7:00 p.m. (read: sarcasm) you’d think I wouldn’t be in a rush for these sweet little ones to be tucked in tight, but I usually am.

The motivation I need to find order in this house and in my schedule is eluding me.  I’m sure that’s adding to my frazzled state.  Perhaps I should ask it to come back.  I need a heavy dose of Love and Logic and a major shot of consistency.  And I’m listening closely for the answer to my prayer, “how do I help my children love each other?  treat each other kindly?”  My first prayer had the term, “make them…” but I quickly saw my error.  I’m sure He’ll answer when I quit gritting my teeth and find empathy when doling out consequences. 

So tomorrow.  I will use my time wisely.  I will be patient and kind.  and not yell.  and take deep breaths. 

The day he’s been waiting for…

 

This darling little thing started preschool today.  He couldn’t wait.  All week he’s been asking if he was going to Miss Kerry’s today.  It was torture yesterday when we dropped his sister off and he had to stay in the car with me.  Today he was ready to go!  He was so excited to meet new friends and kept telling me what a big boy he was.

Miss Seneca was a great big sister, showing him around and helping him know how to do things.  He did great.  He has told me four times since he got home, “mom, I go to preschool sometime?”  yes, tomorrow.  “OK!” with a big smile.

Man, they are getting  way too big.

my people.

I’m usually not five days late welcoming in the new year with a new theme, something to focus on, something to hopefully impact how I will live during the year.  I haven’t felt a rush this year, and haven’t had something screaming to get out of me.  I am, however, loving this idea of recording my hopes for others.  I pulled the following off of Ashlee’s blog: 

President Packer shared an interesting perspective in his book “Memorable Stories with a Message”:

Donna and I attended an unusual dinner at the home of one of our beloved friends. It was a New Year’s Eve party. Our host had an activity for the evening. He read a quotation from Heber C. Kimball: “I have said often, you may write blessings for yourselves and insert every good thing you can think of, and it will all come to pass on your heads, if you do right.” (From an address in the Old Tabernacle, August 1853.)

He gave each of us a sheet of paper and an envelope and suggested we write upon the paper the things we hoped to achieve in the new year. We were asked to seal the envelope and put our name on it. “I will take these to the bank and put them in the vault,” he said. “A year from now we will meet again and have a dinner and I will deliver them to you. And we will tell if you wish, how nearly we have achieved our goals.”

We thoughtfully set our goals that night and sealed them up, and they were delivered to the vault to lay unopened for a full year. Six things were on our list, each relating to a blessing for someone dear.

Each seemed near to the impossible. One, for instance related to a sister and … marriage. Worthiness was no problem; it was her body so crippled with disease that a [marriage] was out of the question or was it?

The year rolled by and the envelopes were delivered to us again. During the year, with those goals in mind, we had prayed now and then, and then little opportunities came by. They would have gone unnoticed if we had not set the goals.

We were able to move forward, first with one goal, then with another. Five impossible things had happened. The sixth related to the solution of a problem of a friend.

It was on New Year’s Eve that I received a telephone call from across the country. My friend excitedly told me that his problem had been solved. He knew nothing of the notes in the envelope. (Boyd K. Packer, Memorable Stories With a Message, [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2000], p. 7-8.)

I have had amazing success when I take the time to write out what I hope the result will be before I embark on a specific project, journey or activity.  If I picture the end result and feel gratitude for the way things turned out, it is amazing to me how often things come to pass just the way I had hoped.  It reminds me that Heavenly Father is waiting to pour out blessings upon us and is looking for opportunities to answer our prayers. 

I have taken the time the past few days to write out the hopes I have for people close to me this coming year.  I know that they have their own hopes and agency, but it has been nice to really think about what I would love to have happen for those I love.  It has taken the focus off of me and made me think about how I can help them achieve peace and happiness this year.  There were a few things that came to mind and I was stopped, thinking that what I was hoping for was too much to accomplish in a year.  Then I remembered one of Jaime’s goals for this year that I adopted as my own: to listen to the Holy Ghost when He speaks to me and follow through without question.  Nothing is impossible for God to achieve if it is his child’s best interest and if obedience warrants the bestowal of the blessing. 

I am excited for the things that will happen for “my people” this year.  I am excited that I get to be a part of their lives and witness the miracles that Heavenly Father has in store for them. 

Christmas break

We enjoyed Christmas day at home and after dinner packed up the car to head to Utah. 

We enjoyed a fun-filled week with cousins and grandparents. 

We went bowling with grandma and grandpa Robinson and our Elton cousins.

 

We waited ever-so-patiently for it to snow.  Thankfully the heavens obliged! 

9

We cheered on Grandpa’s team and watched him do his thing.

We enjoyed great ski days.  Seneca and Beckham enjoyed fun days with Grandmas.

We visited with five sets of grandparents and caught up with old friends.

Grandpa Boyd, Grandma Jeanne, Davey and his darling kids.

Discoveries of the week:

My boys have skills when it comes to Wii dancing.  Nine people can crowd around a computer to watch a basketball game go into double overtime and have it be just as exciting as if we were there… and Drew won!  Denten still has a mean spin-ball leftover from his high school bowling days.  Davey’s little boy Casey would be on my list for Seneca if arranged marriages existed in this culture.  Oh, the dimples!  A functioning car heater is absolutely necessary if I am in a cold weather climate for any amount of time.  and seat heaters.  Skiing in single-digit weather is not nearly as grueling as I anticipated.  My son is not quite ready for steep mogul runs as evidence by two major wipeouts down the mountain.  Luckily he still liked skiing (and us) after we missed our turn and ended up there.  Sleeping upstairs at Grandma Delores’s house in below freezing weather requires an electric blanket and thermal underwear.  Coop follows the game of basketball very well and understands when to yell “defense” consistently and at the top of his lungs.  Pat’s BBQ in SLC is a shady, shady place, but well worth the grub.  Road trips with my children get a little better each time. 

It was a lovely week.