it's official. we own it. good thing considering I put paint all over the walls today. carpets are being cleaned, painters come first thing tomorrow, cleaning girls at noon. it's going to be a whole new house! except that it's old, but you know what I mean.

boxes are being packed continually, dinner group meals are saving me, beckham still insists on about 70 primary songs every night. life does not feel normal, but it's a good life.

pretty random: moving week

I accidentaly grabbed a fork to eat my cereal with this morning. That's how tired I am. Another sign I look haggered? At 6:30 this morning, the clerk at the store asked if I was just getting off work. Ha. I wish, that would mean I could go to bed, right??

I have completely loved this place, but I am very much looking forward to quiet nights. The kind with no car alarms at 4:30 a.m. The kind where I don't have to have a conversation with my drunken, incredibly loud neighbor at 1:30 a.m. asking her to please turn down her music. She and I will probably love each other in heaven, but it is best for our relationship if I move away.

Reviewing budget and financial stuff, I have found that in order to keep focused on the positive, I need a few gratefuls:

-I am grateful we are in a position to purchase this house and for all the help getting us there.
-I'm grateful closing costs were much less than we originally anticipated. Major bonus.
-I am grateful Denten has a steady job with a reliable income.
-I am grateful that D's student loan payment was lowered this month.
-I am grateful that he gets reimbursed for all of his travel. That's a major chunk out of our auto budget each month and it's nice to see it flow back in.
-I am grateful for bonus energy sessions that bring in unexpected money.
-I am grateful for coupon shopping. I haven't been doing it, but I am looking forward to being excited about it again! How's that for a positive affirmation!
-I am grateful for friends who are willing to be hired for cleaning and carpets and painting. It's nice to trust the people in my home and give the business to great families.
-I am grateful for family that is going to come help me move. This isn't actually happening, but perhaps if I throw it out to the universe, a miracle will occur!
-I am grateful I have a busy day. Although at some point a nap is going to sound incredible.

over and out.

expect a miracle.

when an apostle of the Lord tells me to expect a miracle, who on earth am I to doubt?!

"There is another kind of faith, rare indeed. This is the kind of faith that causes things to happen. It is the kind of faith that is worthy, and prepared, and unyielding, it calls forth things that otherwise would not be. It is the kind of faith that moves things. It is marvelous, even a transcendent power, a power that is as real and as invisible as electricity. Directed and channeled, it has a great effect. Expect a miracle. "

-Boyd K. Packer

thank you, patria!

happy birthday, little brother

dear boogs.

I know you won't read this, but I'm writing it just the same. I am so incredibly proud of you and couldn't be happier about the experiences you're having. I was nervous, as was everyone, for you to have this adventure, crossing my fingers it would not turn out like the last. That first nightmare is proving to be an incredible blessing as it taught you things that do not hold a price. There is not a finer example of doing what you're asked without question, of a solid work ethic and an obedient missionary. There is nothing more I would ask for in an uncle for my children. The success you are finding is directly correlated with your faith and efforts and I'm so grateful I get to have a peek into those precious moments. My hope for you before you left was the you came home with no regrets. I can see clearly that you are doing everything you can for that to happen. I love you like crazy. happy birthday, ben.

love,
AB

just breathe.

I looked in the mirror tonight and thought, "I look tired."

I suppose it made sense, because I feel tired. It was a day where I heard myself speak to my children and my tone was less-than-nice too often. It was a day where I had to consult my to-do list every 10 minutes because I was wandering in circles. I eventually got quite a bit accomplished, but felt I was dealing with whining, and bickering more than usual.

My day culminated when, courtesy of my first-born, blue easter egg dye moved in slow motion all over sister carter's counter, chair, floor and wall. oh my. brother carter played it off as no big deal, and I figured, sure, why not leave them with a few blue spots on their baseboards to remember me by?

I walked outside to find denten and couldn't fight the tears. why are you crying? I didn't quite know how to explain. I have fifty things going on in my life, and fifty more jockying for a prime spot in my head and while they are all good things, I feel overwhelmed.

I'm grateful denten came home tonight. I'm grateful he handled bedtime. I'm grateful we had a good dinner to eat that was easy. I'm grateful I have boxes to pack and stuff to put in them. I'm grateful that Cooper wants to play "go fish" with me every single night.

I'm grateful for the best neighbors on the planet. They may be counting down the days until the madness moves away, but I honestly try not to think about it. Just this week goods have exchanged homes in the form of padded envelopes, gallon zip-locks, eggs, toys, shoes, fruit and even a haircut. The list would be endless if I tried to document every phone call asking for something needed, and it goes both ways. I pray that someday, somewhere, I will have neighbors like them again, but I know it will never be the same. The love for my kids, the service to my family, the laughs, the tears... aah, it's too much.

Tonight I'm grateful that today is over and I have another chance tomorrow. I'm grateful for all of the great opportunities my family has right now and I hope that I can handle them well. i'm ok, I'll be ok. I'll follow my mother's advice and take one thing at a time. Good night.

saturday

buy birthday present
pick up fundraiser stuff
mail package to mom
exchange stuff at old navy
exchange stuff at gap
pick up produce basket
home for quick lunch
kids pretend to nap
run coop to birthday party
get soccer pics
fill up with gas
get kids out of bed
drive to new house with shellie
get her expert opinion on paint colors, and other stuff
home for a quick dinner
kids to carters
run to the store for next week's dinner group meal
groceries put away, pick up kids
bathe little ones, read, sing, to bed
pick up the tornado that is my house
breathe

I am ready for bed and I'm not even the one who was racing today! He had a blast, by the way. And for the record, I knew he would.

my baby

will be doing this tomorrow:



50 miles of trail running, mountain biking, rappelling and kayaking. He's on a four-man team, they all do the entire course together. It's gonna be a blast!

climbing. (edited)

Beckham came into my bedroom this morning at 6:24. no one had gotten him out of his crib.

he displayed his new trick again today 2 minutes after I had put him down for his nap.

he helped me get the screwdriver.

Beckham is the proud new owner of a doorknob that locks from the outside.


I am open to alternative suggestions if they do not require me losing my mind, because that is not an option right now.

edited: come to find out, daddy helped the little guy figure out how to escape his current sleeping arrangments, you know, "so he wouldn't get hurt," and then daddy left town for the weekend. hmmm. brillant plan.

bex was a little under the weather today. last night he had a little fever when he went to bed. when I checked on him before I went to bed, he was still warm and after a little love, I went to my room and laid in bed listening to him sing. He sang his primary songs, his new favorite being "popcorn popping." He sang about 5 songs, in the sweetest little voice, just laying in his bed. He knew enough of the words that it was easy for me to tell what he was singing. It was a sweet moment for me.

today at the park it was clear he still wasn't feeling great as he wanted to sit with me rather than run and play. he slept for more than three hours this afternoon and afterwards was much more himself. I don't like him feeling crummy, but I sure like the cuddly side of a mellow baby.

denten was late tonight taking care of work and house stuff and as I went through our bedtime routine with everyone myself, I was thankful for the moments I have with my children. usually I have a hard time with that time of day- I just want to be done, but the past while the quiet time reading on the couch, the funny prayers they deliver, even the crazy bath time has been much more enjoyable to me. I feel that I could be doing much more with them, but sometimes a few stories and singing together in their beds is enough. Enough to feel that they know they are safe and loved. Enough to know that I'm the right mom for them. Enough to feel that Heavenly Father is pleased with my efforts.

It is a constant effort for me to balance my responsibilities as a mother to these little ones and the responsibilities I have running my household and dealing with other life stuff that just needs to be done. I do not understand how mothers who work out of the home do it all, I am in awe of their time management skills. I feel exhausted at the end of every day simply taking care of my home and my family and engaging with the friends I have close to me. I am grateful to have the opportunity to play with these little souls every day.

seven things

1. The Harlows are leaving our ward. I'm sad they are leaving, although, so am I so we wouldn't be neighbors anymore, anyway. Jayme has been a fun friend for me with a different perspective sometimes that is refreshing. Her children came to play this morning and they are great. They are polite and kind and they are good listeners. Cooper and Josie decided they needed to write letters to each other, the kind that come in the mailbox. So glad that kind still exist.

2. Have you thought about Mother's Day yet? Joete's Playground is holding an online auction and will have awesome things up for grabs. It will be up and running the week of April 19. This is where you want to spend your money this year! Tell you husbands, brothers, fathers, children and all others who drop moola on this holiday! Don't worry, I'll remind you.

3. We finally have a moving date... you were wondering if it was really going to happen, weren't you?! I kind of was. Well, it is. Next weekend. Now comes coordinating cleaning, carpets, painting, loading up and transferring life from this location to that one. Now that it's real, I'm a little anxious to just get going, but there is a pull keeping me here. Maybe a couple of pulls. Maybe if they would just move too, it would be easier to leave!

4. I had shrimp tacos for dinner that were yum. Maybe I will make them for my new neighbors someday. That would make them like me. I also received awesome recipes from Ashlee this week. Maybe I will cook more in my new house. A girl can dream.

5. Seneca sometimes pretends she is in distress and Cooper comes to her rescue. This happens at home, in the backyard, at the park, in the store... wherever. She suddenly calls out, "help! ayudame!" yes, she calls for help in spanish. it's hilarious. She also corrects Beckham when he says "thank you," and insists that he says "gracias," instead. If I mistakenly respond with, "you're welcome," I am instantly reprimanded. "Da nada" is the appropriate response.

6. My kids love being outside. They spend the majority of their day out there on a regular basis. I'm grateful we live in a place they can enjoy pleasant weather much of the year. I wonder if they would like to play outside if we had snow on the ground. Cooper would, the others I'm not so sure. I'm excited for our new yard. It is heaven to me and I hope they feel the same.

7. I feel like I have laughed a lot lately. Some things I laugh at are genuinely funny, some are probably ridiculous. We watched, "Have you heard of the morgans?" last weekend. It was silly, a little cheesy, but I laughed out loud several times. Denten fell asleep (that's how good it was) and I kept waking him up when I would laugh. I have also laughed at Wade Eager lately. I just think he's funny. Those two are some I truly hope to stay in touch with and see periodically after we move. And... Did you watch 24 last night? I laughed out loud, a few times. No, it's not a comedy, and Denten kept looking at me funny, but Chloe was so hilarious to me. I also laugh at Katelyn. She had funny things to say about the health care bru-ha-ha. and I laughed at exercise class this morning at Shellie after a reference to sex was made. Perhaps I'm just easily amused these days.

that's all for now. oh, and I don't think fresh and easy cookies are very good. I'm sure my posterity will want to know that someday. We have tried a few varieties and I am yet to be impressed. My creme puff, however, will be delicious later. good night.

thoughts on health care.

A comment on facebook sparked quite the discussion. My response here:

I will begin by saying that I do not under any circumstance believe this plan to be unflawed. It has its downsides, and they are not to be ignored, but I don't know that there is a perfect plan out there. Is there a bill congress has tried to pass in the last 10 years that doesn't have its up and downsides? That being said, I do believe there are good things to come, and I am referring only to health care. We'll leave abortion and immigration out right now.

I have several close friends and members of my LDS ward who will greatly benefit from this bill being passed. They can not afford health care- and are in a position that this will be a great blessing to them. With unemployment rates what they are today, one can't count on employment benefits to cover their health needs. Even if we are fortunate to be employed right now, that does not automatically come with fantastic health benefits. With the rising cost of privatized health care, very few in my financial situation will be able to afford private coverage for their families in another 10 years. I, for one, am not currently covered under an employer's group policy and hold private one for myself, despite the fact that my husband has a great job. I am grateful to be able to afford it right now, but I know many who are not as fortunate.

Another school of thought is "why health care, anyway?" Why not just let our bodies take their natural course and heal with natural remedies as our ancestors did? I'm actually a huge fan of this idea and do not frequent the doctor more than I deem absolutely necessary, but for those who are of a different school of thought, they ought to have the option. They ought to be able to receive the medical treatment they desire and not be turned away because they don't fall into the top financial bracket of folks who can afford great health service.

Again, I know there are financial downsides, ones that will most definitely affect our children, but may I venture to say that the current system will leave them paying a different price. With an issue as complicated as this (a 2400-page document!) there is not an easy solution, there is just one that will inevitable be great for some and crappy for others. It's a bummer if you have been getting the good end of the deal until now, but it's someone else's turn.

A friend, who wished not to get involved in the facebook conversation, sent this:

I'm sorry to see that you guys are getting attacked likes this on FB. I am not a supporter of the health bill, but that is my opinion. Every one has the right to their own opinion and for people to tell you that you are wrong and to be rude about it is just not right. In fact if I am not mistaken, our great county was built on the fact that people don't have to believe the same as you. It just makes me sad to see two great people treated this way.

While I appreciate the support, I appreciate the open mind more. The fact that it's ok that we feel differently on certain issues, but can be respectful about it, rather than attacking. We come from different backgrounds and have had different experiences that that have shaped our opinions. I appreciate those who can see that.

My family is in a unique situation being exempt from this health care bill, seeing as Native Americans are not required to participate. I do not fall into that category, but my children will have access to affordable, if not free, health care for life, if they choose to use it. We have not, this far, gone that route, but I'm grateful we have the option and I'm grateful that because of this bill others will have the same option... access to affordable health care.

I also believe that I've got people watching over me and my family. I know that we will be protected and receive whatever experiences we are supposed to have in this life. I believe that whole-heartedly. I believe that if we are living the principles of the Gospel, that we are entitled to incredible blessings. I have seen that come to pass and regardless of who the president is of this nation and the decisions he makes, there is a higher power that I answer to. And He and I are ok.

a night at the fair.

The Native American Bar Association of Arizona held a fundraiser at Whirlwind, a world-class golf course on the Gila River reservation.  Denten enjoyed a fantastic 18 holes at a course on which he could spend every weekend.  Thankfully he loves us, so he came home, packed us up and went back to Sacaton.  Mul-chu-tah is a festival with a carnival, fair and rodeo.  Several times I had to take a deep breath and try not to be grossed out at the environment, but the kids had a great time!  Let’s just say that the food offered at a fair is all completely disgusting to me.  There was good fry bread, but really, there is a reason that 90% of the people that frequent carnivals are overweight.  And the dust, and the germs… eeek.

Anyway, we had fun together.

Seneca enjoyed the music and is not shy.

That’s my white kid with his hands up.   Denten commented as Cooper was waiting in line that no one would ever guess he was a registered member of a nationally recognized indian tribe.  Nope, he just looks white.

Coop and his first attempt at darts.  Thankfully he popped a balloon, whew!

This one fit right in, and I think she helped me fit in.  We saw one other white person all night.  Holding Seneca’s hand somehow made it ok for me to be there.  Otherwise, my boys and I were quite a sight.

 

The desert, to me, is mostly flat, brown and ugly, but it does occasionally provide the setting for a gorgeous sunset.

friday.

I thought my tailbone was healed, until I tried to jump around this morning for cindy. I was mistaken. I was reminded again this evening as I tried to do hand-stands and cartwheels with cooper. Major ouch. I'm blaming it completely on the ice injury and not at all on the fact that I may be getting old.

I took a grocery bag into the playroom today and came out with it full of garbage. It was satisfying. How do we accumulate so much junk?! Junky toys, stickers, old art projects... be gone, all of you! A few more boxes packed means less junk temporarily resides in my home. I like the simplified look we have going on. Is it ok if we just don't unpack when we get to the new place?!

The kids were outside playing before 8 a.m. Rain clouds were threatening, but the sun won today. Just in case the chlorine incident of a few days ago wasn't enough around here, Seneca decided to dump the gas can on the side of the house and splash around in it this morning. Ugh. Yes, I promise there are no more toxic chemicals in my back yard for her discovery. My dad asked that I please not be that mom that appears on the Today show for allowing my children to play with such things. That is not one of my life goals. It was nice, however, to have lunch and dinner served outside so my freshly mopped kitchen floor stayed that way. A huge plus considering rice was a component of dinner and there is no way on earth for that to be a clean meal.

Coop is mastering his sight words and loves to find new games where he can beat me. He asked me today how to say "tornado" in Spanish. I didn't have that one on the top of my head, so I said "tornado" with a latin accent. He told me he'd like to take a spanish class so he can know what all the words are in spanish. Sounds like a good idea to me. He also informed me that he'd like to take a dance class. This was as he was jumping, doing 360s in the air during the evening dance party around here (the one in which I was attempting hand-stands). He said it's what people did when they ice skated. Thank you, Olympics. He and Seneca were twirling each other around and he decided he wanted to know more moves. Sure... spanish and dance. No problem.

I took advantage of the Gap friends and family discount today. Hopefully we will be stocked for summer. More hopefully, everything will fit when it arrives! I like shopping for my kids. Beckham always gets the raw end of the deal when I shop. It's hard to justify spending moola on him when he's got great stuff that Cooper used to wear. Coop and Senny, however, need all new stuff, every season. That's hard to keep up with!

Between church and work obligations, we have seen very little of dent lately. His list is long and keeps growing. I know the feeling. However, he commented this week that he'd rather "be slammed than be damned with no work to do." Amen to that. I love that he's happy being busy. I love that Heaven showers me with extra love and patience when the end of my rope is near and dad still has a few more hours at the office.

writing project, 2010: enthusiasm.

The word is enthusiasm.  Submitted by Maren, one of my dear New York friends, whom I admire an incredible amount.  If you know her, it is certain that she has blessed your life.  If you don't, make it point to meet her in the hereafter, it will be well worth your time.

I already knew I needed to post today about Beckham, so when I pulled this word out of the bowl today, it was destiny. 

Beckham lives life with enthusiasm.  The down side to my writing about him is that you can't hear or see him in action.  He has not learned the concept of drudgery, or doing something for any other reason than because he wants to.  He wakes up in the morning with enthusiasm, happy to greet whoever he sees first with a huge smile and "hello, mom!"  He is enthusiastic about eating, getting dressed, putting on shoes, getting in the car, playing outside, etc.  I have described him as "jolly" in the past because to me happy combined with roly-poly just sounds like jolly.

(they say he looks like his dad… spittin’ image of when he was little… I can’t see it, can you??)

One thing that epitomizes his enthusiasm is the inflection in his voice.  Beckham gives out "thank yous" freely and each time it sounds as if you've made his whole day.  His gratitude is sincere and full of energy.

One of the things Maren mentioned about enthusiasm when she submitted her word is that it means, "God with us."  I can see Him in Bex.  I can see the pure, unadulterated light of Christ in this little boy.  He is not tainted.  He is honest and unfiltered.  He has not yet learned to alter his authenticity.   While he is learning every day and imitating behaviors he sees in his older siblings, he still possesses the angelic quality that was with him when he arrived.  It is all I can do not to crawl into his crib at night when I check on him sleeping soundly.  His cheeks call out to me.

 

Beckham has had something oozing from him for the last while and I haven't been able to place it, but perhaps it is enthusiasm. While I love to see him and hear him, the sense that I relish the most right now is touch.  I am completely attracted to him and can't get enough.  He has been giving hugs freely and kisses me just for the reaction, which I am thrilled to give.   His skin is soft and smooth, his eyes are dark brown and big and take in the world while smiling.  He wanders around with a little spring in his step and is ready to race to wherever the action is.  His hair is still fine and soft. His body is still squishy and his energy is abundant and displayed in mostly positive ways.  I want to put him in a bottle and keep him just like this forever. 

I’m not sure when the transformation takes place, when they go from being soft children to tough big kids, but I hope he goes easy on me.  He has been irresistible to me and despite his whiny moments, he is a light in our home.   Beckham is enthusiasm, and he's good for my soul.

 

photo courtesy of the coopster.

march 17

- I'm not a very good holiday mom. I have great ideas, they just come too late to do anything about them! good day, nonetheless.

- went to pick up moving boxes from kelly... and ended up with the entire back of dutch FULL of boxes. what a saint she is!

- visited san tan village shopping center today in search for fundraiser items. it is an outdoor shopping area that has super fun stores. I wished a few times that I was there wandering with my mom and sisters rather than with my children, but it was fun anyway. it was 77 degrees today and we enjoyed lunch outside after our shopping errands were done. we spent fun time in barnes and noble and came away with great auction items from there and the aveda salon next door. sisters, next time you're here, I'm ditching my children and taking you on a shopping date!

- charmed the nice man at AT&T customer service into issuing a refund considering they charged us a full month's bill for 9 days of phone usage. glad we're done with them.

- enjoyed a pleasant chat with kari at poison control after seneca found some chlorine tablet pieces in the backyard. "it's spicy, mom!" yeah, bet it is. she's fine.

- ate pesto stromboli for dinner. it was green and you know what today is. it was a yummy, easy recipe courtesy of the domestic goddess down the street. the kids loved it.

- sent cooper with denten to help a sister in the ward move furniture back into her house. bathed the little ones, rinsing sand out of their hair from the park. wiping up my bathroom floor from the cup fulls of water that seemed to erupt every 15 seconds. seneca had beckham laughing so hard he couldn't see straight. I'm pretty sure little kids laughing is the best sound in the world.

- I've got a new group energy session in the works on health and weight loss. I'm sure about the topic, but the date is still eluding me.

- I've gotten into the habit of lazy afternoons. It's so easy to be unproductive when the kids entertain themselves outside all afternoon! I need to get back in packing and cleaning mode. Maybe my actions will prove that I have faith this house will actually close!! I think I've been in denial.

- I intended to take pictures today, but you'll recall my small camera is out of commission. I'll make a better effort tomorrow.

order, and daughters.

I spent a little time organizing my head today. With so many things going on, I have felt scattered, which isn't doing much for my goal this year of maintaining order. My home is wondering what on earth is going on... I packed madly for a few weeks and then nothing. Limbo. clutter has worked its way back in and it's been driving me crazy. I've also had a million little notes about current projects floating around that needed to be wrangled and put into one place. Mission accomplished. lists have been made and we're back in business.

I had a moment today when I glanced at seneca that made me wonder what on earth I'm doing. Being a mom to a little girl, that is. It was this sudden weight I felt, like the responsibility of raising a righteous daughter of God just hit me and I felt completely inadequate and not up to the task. Perhaps it is my own experience as a teenager that makes me fear that time for her, but for some reason raising a daughter seemed much more taxing than raising a son today. She hasn't been difficult in the least, but there are so many vulnerabilities out there, so much to teach her to beware of without scaring her. I know that the Spirit will guide us and that she has amazing angels helping both of us along, and thank heavens for that. She has amazing things to accomplish on earth and I want to be someone who helps and assists and not hinders her potential. She is growing up slowly and is more beautiful to me every day. I'm so grateful to have her in my home.

the weather is completely fabulous right now. the kids were outside most of the day, and I didn't even freak out when the little lady decided barefoot was the way to go. it is warm and beautiful. and I finished my book... thanks to the hours spent playing outside.

I need better titles.

are you tired of me posting daily when I don't have big news? well, (said as kindly as possible) you aren't obligated to read! journaling... that's the purpose.

spent two hours on the phone today talking to various customer service agents getting our auto-debit accounts changed over. yes, it was a pain, but I think everything is in place. gotta make a few manual payments, but I can handle that.

made it to costco, and fresh and easy. cooper was in charge of the shopping list. he led us through the store, read things off the list and crossed them off when we found what we were looking for. it's fun to see him become familiar with new words.

we used boston's game today with sight words. we have a stack of cards with words on them. if he got the word on the first try, it went into his pile. if he missed it, it went into mine. there were cookies on the line. the one with the biggest pile got the cookies. he killed me, thankfully. we went over the few he missed and he enjoyed his cookies. he spent quiet time doing his math workbook and art projects. he worked on math flashcards while I got dinner ready.

we did pork tacos today for dinner group. the pork didn't shred as easily as it has before, but it was yummy. we added creamy cilantro dressing from f&e and it was good.

I'm reading "the last song," or whatever the latest nicholas sparks novel is called. I like the story, but it's tainted seeing as I know miley cyrus plays the female lead in the movie. I'm not a fan of hers. I might see it anyway because i'm a sucker for his stories. anybody wanna go?

I'm waiting to hear on a few possible donations for Joete's fundraiser. It's coming together well, although having the website up will help a ton.

got a trip to the children's museum in the works for thursday morning after music class. anybody wanna meet us there?

lots of friends are moving from our ward. some because they want to and some because circumstances are crappy. I like my friends and my little comfort zone here. In some ways it makes it easier to leave knowing that lots of things will be different, but there are still a few that I try not to think about leaving. if only I could take them in my pocket.

d just walked in. he doesn't have a window in suby yet. poor, poor suby.

this week.

saturday: 70 mile bike ride for dad, a much shorter run for me. picking up around the house, playing outside. visiting the bank to get a few details worked out regarding the stolen checkbook. a trip to the temple and dinner with dent.

sunday: dent made pancakes and handled the first hour of the day while I laid in bed and read my book. he left for meetings and we got ready for church. survived the three hours and am grateful that at least cooper came home with something valuable. he learned that we can all be missionaries and had a few ideas for us on how we do that. more reading and a nap. made milwaukee corn chowder for dinner. it was yummy, I should post it.

this week:
- I've got to transfer all of my auto-debits to a new account. a pain, but shouldn't take too long.
- get to costco
- return movies to shello and pay her $7
- return dishes to their various owners
- monitor learning time. preschool is done and cooper and I have come up with a plan for the week of things we want to accomplish. he's excited about sight words, the solar system puzzle and a trip to the children's museum.
- work on shapes with seneca and beckham. they are getting it about 75% of the time, gotta get 'em down.
- get deposits to the bank
- suby's window fixed. poor thing.
- take care of the ice maker.
- don't forget st. patrick's day.
- keep calm and carry on.

we are working with the seller (bank) of our new home to get a few things fixed before we move in and therefore our closing date has been pushed back again. I don't mind- I'm not in a huge hurry and I want the stuff done with the house. I feel like I'm in limbo a little, but our renters are flexible and we're in a good spot.

I fell last week in mccall. the driveway at the cabin was sheer ice, seriously just like a luge chute. I was trying to get in position to get a pic of the kids on the toboggan and wiped out good. the classic feet flying up, landing right on my tailbone and back. whacked my head and elbow and smashed the camera into the ground. I laid there for a minute thinking I was going to die and then realized I could actually move, it just hurt. a lot. anyway, I healed right up and the only permanent damage is the poor camera. it wasn't the big nice one, but it was new and not cheap. major bummer.

I've been working on our Mother's Day fundraiser for Joete's Playground. I'm really excited about it, I think it will be so great. We have awesome people helping out. I'll post more details about that soon.

now I need to make a treat. here's to a productive week!

friday

it was hard to drive away. I'm not much of a winter gal, but I sure enjoyed my winter activities this past week. mega thanks to gram for letting me go play. mega thanks to gram for holding the bag so cooper didn't get sick all over the car today while driving down the canyon. mega thanks to gram for tickling the heck out of beckham in the car so he didn't drive me berserk. mega thanks to gram and grandpa for a super fun week.

can't say the plane ride home was quite as smooth as the one getting there, but we survived and so did the guy in front of beckham, even though he probably questioned that at times. I have incredibly cheerful, friendly children. the exuberance is a little over the top at times. I have absolutely no idea where they get that from. perhaps their dad. he's really over the top.

speaking of dad, we finally found him and believe me, the reunion wasn't a quiet one. I was ready to get out of the car and walk home, the volume and energy in the car was way too much for me. but we're home. back to reality. lots to do and most of it isn't super fun, but such is life.

cooper and I are already planning our next winter excursion. cooper made sure to invite his dad along. he's got lots of things to show him on the ski hill.

thursday

another ski day. it was terrific. cooper had another lesson and came out of it skiing with greater confidence and control than tuesday. he handled the bigger hills easily, it was fun to ski with him. he has his own ideas about where to ski and how to turn and he has such a good time. dad gave me a few more pointers and I can feel that progress will push my body, I wish I had more opportunities to keep working. I was warm and enjoyed the conversation with my dad.

senny and bex did easter crafts with gram. there was more dancing and singing in the basement. there were more card games. there was bad news from home. d's car was broken into at the church and his briefcase was stolen. too much important stuff in there. getting the window fixed will be a pain, but the goods stolen are concerning. while the entire situation is frustrating, we know it could have been much worse and we're grateful it wasn't.

headed home tomorrow. bummer this week is coming to a close, but we think dad misses us a lot. having such a great winter getaway makes me wish we lived closer to a four-season climate, but it also makes me grateful for the opportunity to come here and enjoy winter with my family each year.

wednesday

 

we found a tubing hill.  the kind that rope-tows you up and you fly down.  it has been requested that we add this to the winter traditions when visiting mccall. 

 

cooper was in heaven.  seneca enjoyed the ride up and hunkered down in her tube and covered her eyes on the way down.  beckham stuck with grandpa and didn’t say much.  he was a great sport.  an adult held onto senny and bex on the way down the hill.  it didn’t look steep, but we got going super fast!  the run on the right had a little jump that we caught air on every time.  in the pic above on the right, cooper is beating grandpa in the last race of the day.   what a stinkin’ good time!

11

11 years ago yesterday I got hitched.

11 years ago I was sealed to my eternal companion.

11 years ago I wore a dress that made me feel gorgeous.

Then I vomited in the bushes at the temple. not so gorgeous.

11 years ago I started a family that has gotten more fun as each little person joined us.

11 years ago I tripped over my gorgeous dress and face-planted in the grass.

11 years ago there was a party with big, fluffy, yellow dresses.

There was wrestling and laughing in the big, fluffy, yellow dresses. My mother had to look away.

11 years ago my little brother cried and was mad at my husband for taking me away.

11 years ago I made sacred covenants with my husband that made him mine forever and always.

it's been a darn good 11 years. May whatever comes our way include more gorgeous dresses, more parties, more promises to have and to hold, more fun little people in our family and more wrestling while laughing on the floor.

tuesday

it’s been snowing for two days straight.  makes for soft stuff on the mountain.  cooper took a lesson this morning while dad and I skied.  we picked him up after lunch and took a few runs with him. 

His report card :  “Cooper did well this morning, he’s turning both directions and can control his speed by turning and using his pizza to stop.  He needs to work on leaning forward (not back) to have good balance.”  He got an A+.  Someday that might mean something to him.

with grandpa

 

taking us down the “roller coaster,”  his favorite run.

I love skiing in soft snow.  I love when my hands and feet are warm.  I love feeling the muscles in my body burn in new ways.  I love that my dad will give me new skills to work on.  I love feeling like I’m improving.  I love that this activity was totally enjoyable to me today.  I love that Cooper has a blast and can’t wait to go again.

 

And in case there was any doubt that this one felt left out, let it be gone.  Gram found princess garb and played it up all day.  Bless her soul.

monday

what do we do when we are greeted with winter?

grandpa gives us toboggan rides.

 

we tube.

we have dance parties in the basement.  everyone shows off their best moves.

we build human totem poles.

today.

Dent dropped us off at the airport this morning and it was BUSY. We had plenty of time before our flight, but standing in multiple long lines was not ideal with my little busy crew. We had serious help from our angels today! We avoided the mega-long check-in line by slipping through the first-class line. We passed zillions of people in the security line and walked right to the front, courtesy of the "family line." We were originally assigned 4 seats on the plane, NONE of which were remotely close to each other. This doesn't work well when two of the passengers are two years old! We had great gate agents that made changes easily for us so we could all be together. We had a flight attendant from heaven who was loaded with extra patience and fun. Coop was fantastic on the plane, doing his workbook and projects. Seneca was happy about everything, happy about Cinderella (thank you sis. carter!), happy about snacks, happy about looking out the window. Beckham was friendly, saying "hi" to everyone who passed. He had a few turbulent moments on the plane, but we survived without any scars.

Gram and Grandpa picked us up, helped with luggage, car seats and kids. Took us to get some lunch then hunkered down for the 2-hour drive up the mountain during naptime. There were no naps, but again, we've had much worse as far as road trips go. The destination is just as everyone remembered it... fantastic. Cooper has already created a show for us in the basement.. it's amazing what he can come up with using beanbags, hula-hoops, balls and his body. A virtual circus, I tell you. Beckham is smitten with Grandpa and has found a best pal. Seneca and Gram made necklaces together and she's just happy to be here.

Tomorrow we explore the winter wonderland that is outside... ah, vacation.

a moment of silence, please.

let's take a moment. and be grateful for the few days last week that this mama was able to use the bathroom in peace. you know, like three full minutes without anyone needing my assistance immediately, without anyone needing my physical body, without anyone needing my seat.

* silence *

ah, thank you. those were lovely days. you see, since my house has become busy with little people, I have always looked forward to the times when nature calls because it means I am all by myself for a few precious minutes, but alas, they have figured out where I am and peace is no longer attainable. sigh.

we're going again on a jet plane, but this time they are coming with me. and I'm glad about it because we are going to have a wonderful time. snow, skiing, grandparents... a perfect winter wonderland. it will be fantastic, even if I don't get to go to the bathroom in peace. oh, and I found my slipper!! just in time, whew.

fighting back tears

There are things about South Phoenix that  I can’t wait to escape from… my neighbor’s crazy loud music, the frequent search helicopters overhead, the lack of great places to eat, shop, frequent… but there are things that are killing me to leave behind.  This list is longer and probably deserves a few posts.

One of the biggies is Coop’s preschool.  I can not describe how fantastic it has been for him, for us.  It has been such a great environment for him; he has learned and laughed and thrived, both socially and academically.  Ms. Krysten is doing exactly what she was made for and Mr. Andy is the funniest person Cooper knows.  We’ve been anticipating his last day for a while, but I kept secretly hoping it would never come.  Cooper prepared pictures and notes for each of his friends and made his favorite cookies to share.  The kids in this class are tight, they love each other and get along so well.  Ms. Krysten made today a positive experience allowing Coop to share the fun things about his new house and shifting gears quickly when he got quiet and sad.  He had a chance to give each of his friends a hug and say good-bye.

As I picked him up and we said our good-byes, I had to turn to wipe my eyes.  A place that has had such great energy and given such confidence to a child is never easy to leave behind.  This school is more expensive than any other around, but it has been worth every penny.  I’m sad for Cooper and I’m sad for my others that won’t get to have this same experience.  I know that something else great will fall into place for each of them, but this has been a terrific blessing for our family.

Mr. Andy, Coop getting tickled from behind and Ms. Krysten

 

I’m very grateful for both of them and the influence they have had on Cooper.  With all the junk in the world, it is a blessing to have great people help me teach my kids.

cold feet.

literally.

I lost a slipper. I've had them for longer than I can remember and they live on my feet when I'm at home. I have perpetually cold feet and during the winter months socks alone just don't cut it. Somehow, however, one of my slippers has disappeared. It was a sad, sad week for my left foot.

I bought new warm, furry boots last week in Jackson, and then wore them all week because the footwear I had taken with me simply wasn't adequate. My boots are like little warm cozy coats for my feet and they are so happy.

It was less than 20 degrees in Jackson. Perfectly acceptable to wear fuzzy boots. It is about 65 degrees here. Still acceptable? I was cold (surprise, surprise) Monday and wore my cozy boots and a sweater to fresh and easy to grab some food before Dianna left. I was perfectly comfortable.. it was chilly outside! But as I entered the store I was passed by a girl wearing a mini-skirt, bare legs and flip-flops. I took a look at myself and wondered who looked more ridiculous. I mean, Phoenix has a reputation for being nice all year, and it is, but it's still winter... isn't it??

I'm sticking with the fact that my feet are much happier in layered footwear then sandals this time of year. Besides, they double as slippers until the elusive left one decides to come out of hiding. And we simply can not have cold feet.

the reason for the vacay.

The setting: the Snake Mountains overlooking the Teton Range.

The snow is soft, it’s steep, it’s untouched.

How do you get access to fresh powder like this?

Well, you ride in one of these, of course!

load your crew and your gear into a helicopter, have the pilot fly you as high as possible, where no one else has been and take turns swooshing down the entire mountain. try not to wipe out. repeat over and over again.

denten, lindsay

katelyn, dad

lindsay, katelyn, wade, dad, denten

denten is a man of few words, and he doesn’t throw them around lightly. he deemed the experience amazing.

weeds, bubbles and raisins

We had record-setting rain last month.  It dumped and dumped and I, for one, didn’t mind much.  It made for cozy days with an excuse to stay in.  During the rain that just kept going, something happened to my desert yard.  It turned green… with WEEDS!  oh, so many weeds.  I tried to ignore them, hoping that if I didn’t give them too much attention that they would just go away.  Instead they laughed at me and multiplied.  Even my HOA noticed and sent a lovely form letter kindly asking us to remove the weeds from our property.  Seeing as we are showing our house again this week, I figured we better do something about it.  Please know that this decision was not easy.  I’m pretty certain that pulling weeds was my very least favorite chore growing up.  I did everything I could to get out of it and never quite learned the lesson that if you just keep up with them, it’s not a bad job.  When I was younger, it was ALWAYS a bad job.   Ugh, the memories.  In an effort to not rub my bad weed-attitude off on my children, I made sure it was known that armed with great garden gloves and a spade, pulling weeds was a rockin’ good time!  It should be noted that I did indeed consider paying someone to come take care of them for me.  I resisted the temptation.

I had a weird dream last night and woke up a little cranky with my dream still working it’s way around in my head.  It will sound crazy, but pulling weeds just might have been the therapy I needed this morning.  It is strangely satisfying (albeit trivial) to pull a big weed up by its roots and know you got the better of him.  It’s also satisfying to look behind you as you work forward and see success in the form of no weeds.  Considering how many there were, this is a big feat.

So we worked, Coop and I, for a few hours this morning.  We took a break to ask Beckham not to dump our weed buckets.  We took a break to ask Seneca to stop drinking the water pooled on the table.  We took a break to ask Beckham to stop throwing rocks into the pool.  We took a break to tell Seneca that we don’t play behind the A/C units.  But in between all the breaks, we worked.  Together.  Him with his bucket, gloves and shovel and me with mine (my gloves were cuter). 

When the weeds were gone and the toys were cleaned up, reward was delivered.  Bubbles and raisins did the trick.  They were occupied long enough for me to get the kitchen floor swept and mopped without interruption.  It’s amazing how much joy they get from simple things.  If only they would forever be satisfied with the anticipation of blowing bubbles. 

love month, conclusion

To cap off love month:

I love my family. The one I live with, the one I grew up with and the one I married into. Really, I love all of them.

I love that my sisters motivate me to be better. I love that my parents have the perfect balance of expecting great things and yet loving me just the way I am. I love that my brother is the epitomy of authentic. More on that to come.

I love that my children are independent and yet need me every day. I love that they make me laugh regularly and that affection abounds in my home.

I love that my inlaws love my children unconditionally. I love that they listen and support and never interfere. I love that they give great advice and seem to thoroughly enjoy my family.

I love that my husband is the opposite of judgemental. He sees the big picture. He thinks through things. He balances me. I love that he loves me. I love who we are together.

back.

I'm home. Back from Jackson. Back from beautiful mountains, back from snow. Back from moseying, wandering and shopping. Back from delicious food and great dinner conversation. Back from laughing my head off with my siblings. Back from Wade's Olympic commentary that beats Bob Costas any day. Back from lounging in bed, an afternoon at the spa and multiple layers, all the time.

Back to happy kids. Back to a list a mile long... and only a week to get through it! Oh, lovely vacations!